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November 28, 2011
Well, it looks like the rumors are true. Demi Moore just announced that she filing for divorce from her husband, fellow actor Ashton Kutcher, after six years of marriage. The 49 year old actress was previously married to actor Bruce Willis and rocker Freddy Moore. Mr. Kutcher, who is 33 years old, was never previously married.
While we don’t know, and may never know, the details of their split, it was reported that Ms. Moore stated publicly that she has chosen to move forward with her life, adding that there are certain values that she holds sacred. Monogamy may be one of them as the Internet has been buzzing lately that Mr. Kutcher has been seen around town squiring other women and even cheating on his wife on their anniversary. How low can you get?
While adultery is not grounds for divorce in Florida, the Courts may consider a party’s dissipation of marital assets on a paramour in dissolution actions in this state. Section 61.08, Florida Statutes, specifically states that the “court may consider the adultery of either spouse and the circumstances thereof in determining the amount of alimony, if any, to be awarded.”
The Court also has the authority to consider dissipation of martial assets when fashioning an equitable distribution scheme. Section 61.075, Florida Statutes gives the Court inherent authority to consider the “intentional dissipation, waste, depletion, or destruction of marital assets after the filing of the petition or within 2 years prior to the filing of the petition.”
So, before you cheat on your spouse consider the consequences. You could be paying through the nose and your wallet for a long time to come.
November 2, 2011
72 days. That’s exactly how long Kim Kardashian’s intact marriage to NBA hunk, Kris Humphries, lasted before she filed for divorce on Halloween. Citing irreconcilable differences, it has been reported that Ms. Kardashian, a TV star and multi-industry mogul, will more than likely seek to enforce the prenuptial agreement and deny alimony to her husband. Mr. Humphries was apparently blind-sided by the news and had no idea that he would be on the receiving end of a summons instead of a basketball. He was quoted as saying that he still wants to make his marriage work.
In Florida, that would be possible. Florida law allows a party to temporarily abate or suspend a divorce action for up to 90 days to permit the parties to attend marital counseling and/or attempt a reconciliation. Florida statute §61.052 gives Florida Courts the authority to:
1. Order either or both parties to consult with a marriage counselor, psychologist, psychiatrist, minister, priest, rabbi, or any other person deemed qualified by the court and acceptable to the party or parties ordered to seek consultation; or
2. Continue the proceedings for a reasonable length of time not to exceed 3 months, to enable the parties themselves to effect a reconciliation.
Too bad the previously happy couple didn’t live in the Sunshine State.
October 19, 2011
Often the first thing that couples want to do following the breakup of a marriage is to start other relationships, usually with people who are the polar opposite of their ex-spouses. Dating after divorce can be tricky, especially with minor children around, but despite some potential pitfalls, many men and women ignore the winds of caution and plunge head long into rebound romances. Fortunately, some of these relationships can evolve into successful second or third (or more – but who’s counting?) marriages. However, when reality sets in, the thrill and excitement of that new special someone can be deflated quicker than a balloon that’s lost its helium. So, if you are faced with starting over after divorce, follow a few simple guidelines:
1. Follow your heart, but lead with your head. You may have wanted and even filed for the separation and/or divorce, but that doesn’t mean your emotions will be left totally unscathed. Give yourself some time to heal and get your priorities in order. In order words, if the Judge grants the divorce on a Thursday at 1:30 p.m., don’t become engaged to someone else by 8:00 p.m. the following night. Take some “you” time and do the things that make you happy. Learn to live by yourself a bit and develop the inner strengths you never knew you had.
2. Don’t bow to pressure. A lot of people get pressured from family members, friends or acquaintances who want to see you get back in the saddle again. Start to date when the time is right for you, not someone else. You’ll intuitively know when that is. Don’t rush it. There’s plenty of time for romance and roses.
3. Shield the kids. Divorce can be confusing enough for adults, let alone children. Don’t introduce your kids to your dates until the relationship is firmly established. If you see your children only on alternate weekends, focus on the kids while they are with you and leave dating for weekends or weeknights when the children are with the other parent. Reassure your kids that you love them and that your new love interest will never replace their mother or father.
There is no magic wand that will make post-divorce dating any easier, but following these tips will get you off to a good start.
October 17, 2011
Some spouses or domestic partners like to beat up on the other party in their relationship. That’s nothing new. Neither is the fact that as the economy sours, domestic violence and battery cases have risen across the country. In some states, there has been an increase of 33% in the number of such cases and 73% of all domestic violence shelters attribute the increase to financial issues.[1]
What’s even more surprising is a new trend – cash strapped municipalities and cities may have to stop prosecuting domestic violence cases. Recently, the city of Topeka, Kansas announced that it is ceasing to prosecute domestic violence cases in order to save money. On October 4, 2011, the City Council there proposed this move after the District Attorney’s office there said it could not longer afford to go after the offenders. What’s worse is that the city may change its law and repeal part of the city code that currently bans domestic violence.
Shawnee County, Kansas has already dropped 30 domestic violence cases since September 8, 2011, and people who had been arrested for misdemeanor domestic battery were set free.
Victims’ advocates are crying afoul of the new policies and fear that abusers will become more violent as a result.
September 20, 2011
If you want to know what’s hot in the world of marriage and divorce, you’ve got to check out divorce parties. It’s the latest craze and the ultimate excuse to celebrate. If you think this idea is just for bird brains and beer heads, think again. In June, Rocker Jack White and his now ex-wife, Karen Elson, threw a lavish divorce party in Nashville, Tennessee for 100 of their closest friends. After six years of marriage and two children, the former couple hosted this bash to honor this milestone and their commitment to future friendship as they co-parent their kids in the future.
Not to top this, but jewelers, Spritzer and Furman, are introducing an 18 kt. gold divorce ring. For a mere $3,200 you can own this ring which bears a heart broken in two by a diamond encrusted dagger. Whether you wear it on your ring finger, or another one, it is supposed to signal to others that you are divorced, single and eligible again.
As unusual as that may be, there are actually wedding ring coffins. Yes, you heard it right the first time. Coffins as in death so you can give your wedding ring the burial it deserves. The coffins come in various sizes and finishes. You can even get a coffin engraved with R.I.P. or any inscription you prefer. Believe it or not, wedding ring coffins even have their own Facebook page.
Just when you thought it was safe to swim through the seas of marital discord, wait. Divorce thongs are beckoning. They are available for men and women and come with a number of spot-on comments, such as “Ding, dong. The psycho is gone.” Perfect for that late night rendezvous with your next sweetheart.
And for that divorce party you are going to throw, you must have something sweet to take the bitterness out of the divorce. So wouldn’t you know it: divorce cakes are a booming business. There are a number of varieties. Some feature a dead and bloody groom at the bottom of the cake or a pistol-packing bride at the top. They’re all in good fun, and if you are not sure which type of divorce cake to buy, there’s even a website to tell you how to select the perfect pastry.
So, now that you know the latest and greatest and what’s trending these days, it’s time to crack open the champagne and revel in the undoing of the “I Do’s” and showing the world that divorce can be something to laugh at.
June 9, 2011
If you haven’t heard of Anthony Weiner by now, the New York Congressman who recently sent some provocative and explicit photos and messages to several hot young chicks, you probably are Rip Van Winkle and just awoke from a 20 year nap. What makes this episode even more painful is that this Congressman is married and reports are now swirling around the Internet and network news that his wife is pregnant.
While this appears to be another episode of a powerful man behaving badly in the style of Tiger Woods or Arnold Schwarzenegger, sexting, tempting tweets and photos of “private parts” are not grounds for divorce in Florida. Florida is a no fault state, which simply put, means that if a marriage is irretrievably broken, one party may file for divorce.
However, social media can play a role in dissolution proceedings. If you are in the middle of divorce proceedings, it could be very likely that your spouse and his or her attorney will review your Facebook page and/or your Twitter feeds for incriminating evidence such as racy photos, derogatory wall comments and the like. This evidence can be used against you in a child custody proceeding.
Think you’re safe? Well, think again. Did you have an active profile on LinkedIn, but claim you are not capable of getting a job and need alimony instead? Is your girlfriend bragging about the gold necklace you purchased for her using marital funds when you failed to pay child support that month?
Time will tell if Huma Abedin will give her husband the old heave-ho or, if in the words of the Tammy Wynette song, she will stand by her man.
May 17, 2011
Just when you thought that Arnold Schwarzenegger was driving off into the sunset after his stint as California’s governor, be aware: He’s baaack! And with a love child to boot.
Sometime during his marriage to Maria Shriver, the Terminator recently admitted that he fathered a child with a household staffer. That child is now a teenager and according to published reports, Mr. Schwarzenegger has been financially supporting his son or daughter.
California laws are different than Florida’s, but if that situation occurred here, Chapter 742 of the Florida Statutes would govern this type of paternity action; specifically, §742.10, F.S. which governs the establishment of paternity for children born out of wedlock.
In Florida a child born out of wedlock does not have a legal father if the mother is not married when the child is born[1]. There are several ways to establish a child’s paternity, including marriage, filing an acknowledgment of paternity or by an administrative order after genetic/DNA testing has been done and proves fatherhood.
Paternity or legal fatherhood is good for children because it gives them, among other things, access to financial support from the parents; heredity and medical information; and Social Security benefits.
If Arnold had been thinking all those years ago before straying in his marriage, then maybe now his wife wouldn’t be saying, “Hasta la vista, baby.”
[1] http://dor.myflorida.com/dor/childsupport/paternity.html
April 20, 2011
On April 29, 2011, Prince William of England will marry commoner, Catherine Middleton. Lots has been said in the media about the upcoming nuptials, but little at all has been mentioned about whether or not Kate will sign a prenuptial agreement and what the terms are, if any.
Recently famous New York divorce attorney, Raoul Felder, suggested to Kate Middleton that she “grab as much as she can get.”[1] While no one knows for sure, having a royal prenup would determine if Kate got to keep Princess Diana’s famous blue sapphire engagement ring if the parties eventually split up. Not to mention, of course, all those palaces!
Prenups have been somewhat of a novelty in the United Kingdom. In England, prenuptial agreements were only recognized by the Courts last year as enforceable.[2] However, in Scotland today nearly one-half of young people between the ages of 18 and 24 years said they would sign a prenuptial agreement before marrying.
Prenup or not, let’s hope that Wills and Kate have a long, happy life together.
- [1] http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/03/14/raoul-felders-advice-royals_n_833820.html
- [1] http://www.theage.com.au/opinion/i-love-you-kate-now-sign-here-20110310-1bpns.html
March 24, 2011
It’s that time of the year again. April 15th will be here before we know it. If you are in the middle of a divorce or have recently separated or divorced, there are certain tax consequences that may apply to you. Thankfully, the Internal Revenue Service has a publication tailor made for these situations. It’s Publication 504 and can be found on the IRS’ website, www.irs.gov.
This IRS publication gives helpful tips. For instance, did you know that under your divorce decree if you pay your former spouse’s medical and dental expenses, you may be able to deduct them as alimony on your income tax return? It also lists general rules about providing your spouse’s social security number and tax deductions for separated parents.
If you are interested in learning more, check it out at http://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/p504.pdf. You may save yourself some money and a visit from the tax man.
March 11, 2011
All marriages are not the same and neither are divorces. Sometimes parties can amicably split, but more often than not, parties would rather endure root canal than remain friendly with their ex-spouses especially when there are children involved.
It seems these days that a lot of eyes focus on celebrities, their extravagant lifestyles, sometimes outrageous behaviors, their loves and losses, as well as their careers so what better place to examine familial and/or post-marital relationships.
Demi Moore and Valerie Bertinelli are examples of good divorces. Demi Moore, who married Ashton Kutcher, following her divorce from Bruce Willis, still remains good friends with her ex-husband. In fact, Demi and Ashton were among the guests at Bruce’s wedding in 2009 to Emma Henning. In 2006, Bruce Willis was quoted as saying that he is good friends with his ex-wife’s new husband.
Another example of a great divorce is Valerie Bertinelli’s split from rocker husband, Eddie Van Halen. In January of this year Valerie Bertinelli remarried businessman, Tom Vitale. Valerie’s ex, Eddie Van Halen, and Eddie’s new wife, were guests at the wedding and even posed for pictures together with the happy couple. While these friendly divorces seem almost fairy tale in nature, the stark reality is that most divorces are not so nice.
Who can forget this nasty celebrity divorce: Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger? The couple divorced in 2002 after nine years of marriage, but the battle continued for years afterwards over the custody of their daughter, Ireland. It made international headlines especially after Mr. Baldwin left a voice mail tirade on the phone to his then 11 year old daughter in 2007 by calling her, among other things, a “rude . . . pig.” Mr. Baldwin made claims of parental alienation and eventually the matter was resolved. . . but at what cost to the child? Some other recent horrific divorces involve Tiger Woods, Sandra Bullock, Meg Ryan and Dennis Quaid and Kelsey Grammar[i].
But the Oscar for the nastiest break up ever goes to Charlie Sheen. . . . this time for his marriage to Wife number 3, Brooke Mueller, who has filed for divorce. She was recently granted a restraining order and custody of their twin sons after their father’s recent highly publicized meltdown. It seems that Charlie would have learned a lesson following his ugly divorce from former wife, Denise Richards, that involved joint allegations of the other’s unfitness as a parent and abusive behavior.
In short, divorces are never easy, but you can always follow the advice that actor Will Smith gave to Bruce Willis after his divorce, “He told me that you have to put the kids first, and even if it’s awkward you have to get together with the new girlfriend or spouse – whoever it is. It was just great advice.”[ii]
[i] Although not officially married, these breakups are notable: Mel Gibson and Oksana Grigorieva; Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins; and Halle Berry and Gabriel Aubry. [ii] http://www.femalefirst.co.uk/celebrity/Bruce+Willis-2911.html
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